Last night, I was taking a friend who was on his way home for the holidays and he asked me what I was going to do this weekend, since I’m not flying out until Monday and everyone else will have headed out by then. I thought ahead to the next three days and all that time alone in my apartment seemed like blissful peace. I love to travel and I love my friends, but I also love being at home alone, and that’s not something I’ve had much time for at all lately.
I remember back when I was married, and I would dream about having a small apartment of my own. I would have friends over; I’d cook for them; sometimes I’d just curl up in a chair and read a book by the fire. It was a long and convoluted path to that apartment. I got sidetracked along the way, but I think I’m finally ending up there.
It’s difficult to know when to not get distracted from your goals and when the distraction is something that you just never thought about before but might be even better than what you initially wanted. Sometimes, you have to head down a path for a while before you really can figure it out. And even though I’m still learning and making mistakes and will be forever, one thing I’ve learned is that you don’t have to fear choosing a path. You can always turn off onto another one later.
So, I sit in my apartment alone. And can think of nothing better than spending the next few days here, getting caught up on stuff, writing, watching the water. And I’ll go along this path until another fork happens along that’s worth exploring.