Category Archives: Life

It’s when you’re really sick and you can barely move and you think that maybe some really good medicine might help and of course, you’re not sick in a way that means you’re not hungry (because at least then you’d … Continue reading →

A couple of years ago, Steve Martin wrote a novel called An Object of Beauty that on one hand was an inside view of the art world, but on the other hand was about waiting for the other shoe to … Continue reading →

I paid extra for the room with the patio overlooking the mountains. It has two comfy chairs and ottomans, a chaise lounge, a view of a beautiful sunny sky. I’m writing this from inside as I look out through the … Continue reading →

By 9pm, I have nothing left to give. That sounds melodramatic and overwrought and it’s not as bad as all that. I’m simply tired and I can sit at my desk and look at my monitor, but my brain won’t … Continue reading →

When I first experienced the transformative event, doctors recommended I take some time off. And by recommended, I mean they commanded it. My primary doctor told me I needed to take off at least a month and strongly hinted that … Continue reading →

I’m reading a book by a comedian and he starts the book by talking about the book proposal process. He sends in the proposal to his editor, who hates it, thinks it’s a terrible idea.  But the editor doesn’t say … Continue reading →

We couldn’t look directly at the sun or we might go blind. I was scared. I didn’t want to be blind. We were all gathered on my grandparents’ back patio, where much later I sat with them and smoked cigarettes and tried … Continue reading →

This guy lives in his van on the street over from my house. He moves the van from one side of the street to the other every couple of days, but always within a single block. When the weather is … Continue reading →

Today, I posed this to the therapist: I keep ending up in the same place over and over. One friend tells me I must shut down my company and do something else because I keep trying to make changes and … Continue reading →

Today, I came across this: Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something. Last week I was in despair about what to do with my life WHILE I WAS WALKING IN THE SUN ON A BEAUTIFUL BEACH. And not … Continue reading →

Yes, Taylor Swift again. She’s like that wise old man at the top of the mountain dispensing the meaning of life. Only with more bouncy curls. I’ve been reading the archives here and the patterns are frustrating. Looking back, I … Continue reading →

So get this. Apparently it’s not my responsibility to solve the problems of the entire world. Who knew? This is a fortunate turn of events, since as it happens, I’m not actually able to solve the problems of the entire … Continue reading →

Because I want to be wholly improved, feel as though I should be completely cured by now (time has past, money has been spent on retreating, medicating, analyzing, and so on), I continue to be surprised by signs that I … Continue reading →

According to convention wisdom, it seems there are two ways of completely changing your life, in the case that you wake up one day and realize you’ve been living it entirely wrong. The first way involves introducing small changes that … Continue reading →

This is what I thought about when I thought I was going to die. Backstory: Perhaps ironically, only days earlier I was at a book event, where bookish people walked around and eyed us author types as one might evaluate … Continue reading →

I’m caught between two equally crushing feelings: 1) I’m too old (that is, smart) to believe in the white horse, in Lloyd Dobler holding the boom box in the rain, in that feeling that someone who I only want wants … Continue reading →

I always have a collection of half-written drafts that remain unposted here. All these lists of pop song lyrics, as though perhaps I’m hoping the truth of life is surfaced through radio happiness. Right now, it’s mostly a collection of … Continue reading →

One of my favorite movies is Love Affair (all three versions). But why? I’m the least sentimental person I know. I have not made it a habit to believe in love or look for love or wistfully pine for love. … Continue reading →

The trouble is the wine cabinet. A friend gave it to me when she moved and while I did manage to carry it from my car into the house, it’s awkwardly shaped and folds out, which makes it difficult to … Continue reading →

I collect words, which is much easier to do now that I read most of my books on the iPad Kindle app. I want to rush out and buy hard covers of all of those books so I can pile … Continue reading →

I have a pond in my front yard. An actual pond with a waterfall that magically turns on at 10am and off at 8pm. A little bridge spans an even smaller “stream” part of the pond and leads from the … Continue reading →

From my driver, bringing me home from the airport last night: “You are a blessed woman. It is contagious. I will go home and also be blessed.” It’s true. I know it’s true and I see it and I feel … Continue reading →

I like to believe that I spent my entire life on a sunny beach on California and my days were like living in a Katy Perry song. However, this is just a lie I tell myself. In reality, I have … Continue reading →

How it happened is this. I didn’t set out to start a business or run a company or have employees. I didn’t have revenue goals, business plans, value props. What happened was, someone asked me for help. And I felt … Continue reading →

I read something funny, compelling, witty, charming, beautiful. I, 1) want to be a good writer 2) want to have time, energy, passion to write, interesting things to write about even though I know writing well isn’t about that at … Continue reading →

So here’s how I ended up scrolling through shopping results online that included the “three hole love doll” and assorted silicone body parts. It started innocently, really. OK, sort of. Some friends and I went to an event at this … Continue reading →

“Your hair is so dark… I mean, it still looks good though.” This, then, how my mom greets me as I walk in. I don’t expect anything different, of course. Which is fortunate, since throughout the day that I learn … Continue reading →

I know I have to do something about the stress when every phone call, every email, every time someone just says hi makes me angry. I feel the moment of weakness and that only makes me angrier, knowing I’m in … Continue reading →