you work at a smile and you go for a ride

Road trip: day 19 of who knows how many days. So far, I’ve mostly been driving in circles. The last time I fled the world with no plan and no end, I ended up in Paris, Barcelona, San Sebastian. This time, I haven’t made it farther than California. But then, that seems to be where I always find myself when I don’t know where I’m going.

I’m happy. I have no idea where I’m going, but I know that I’m happy.

I guess I quit my job again. It was complicated and it all turned dark and awful and all my old fears came back. But that’s over now. I keep learning, learning about what not to do and who not to trust and I guess life will always be that way.

But you keep going, and somehow you get to the other side. I just happened upon this Joseph Campbell quote: “we must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

I still don’t know how it ends and now I don’t even know what comes next. But something will come next.

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